MyNewJersey

Keeping with the reporting on the hottest news stories around, I submit the following for your weekend pleasure. Despite the fact that Patrick doesn't think this is news, I believe this to be the top story of the day.

I don't know what my favorite part of this article is; there's just too many to chose from. Let's start with the headline, "Unsolicited Bear-Knocking." Let's be serious. When is bear-knocking solicited? 'Oooh, there's a bear here selling girl scout cookies! Let's solicite him to come in!' Secondly, the bear knocked three times and only now after THREE times are the Loknar family refusing to answer the door any longer. Once, fair enough. Knock on the door, you answer. It's a bear, holy shit. Twice, um, after that first knock I'm running out of that goddamn house like I'm Lindsay Lohan at a Sizzler. Three times??? What a stupid bunch of Slavs! Headline should read "Dumb Croats Get Eaten by Bear. Idiocy Cited."

Pat seems to think this is not news at all. "Where's the story? Croations are easily fooled. They are too busy practicing the 2012 Olympic gymnastics to figure out these bear tricks."